Blame it on the swine flu

Several Tulane football players have come down with swine flu like symptoms.

Let the jokes ensue.

Distractions

Thanks, ALTL! I feel immediately energized just watching that video. Who knew Mandy Moore looked so good in a Laura Bush suit? She looks great!

I have rough 3 years ahead of me, but hopefully the pursuit of procrastination will give me more opportunities to blog!

And now I don't have that annoying job thing to get in the way of my Head Pelican time. Also - no more men for the next 3 years - no more distractions! I am now married to law school and the Head Pelican.

Give your vagina wings!

I bought ALTR a case of this to celebrate her starting law school.

Red Bull Energy Douche with Mandy Moore from Mandy Moore

Buy me a drink!

Depending on what circles you run in, you may or may not have heard about the free T Pain show on Tuesday night at the House of Blues.

After waiting in line for, oh, 1.5 hours, we finally made it into the gates of House of Blues, only to be a couple people late to get into the capacity filled HoB. While the security hassled the skanky and obnoxious feather-earringed girl and her crew, my roommate and I watched the show on the tv from the comfort of the bar. Not wanting to lose our prime seating, my roommate filled not one, but two cups with urine, the last one sprinkling slightly on my leg. In my tequila-drunk disbelief I start smacking his arm and yelling at him for pissing on me when the girl next to me realized that she got hit too - despite his protests that there must be a leak in the ceiling! At that moment, three people emerged from the over heated crowd, the new security guy looked right at me, and I grabbed Peaches from the clutches of the hysteric girl and we made it into the show.

All in all an eclectic crowd and actually a pretty good show. But get this - after the last song was played, the crowd pretty much RAN out of the HoB. No encore. I encouraged Peaches to get a set list, and when I turned around from bumming a cigarette off of a stranger, I see him with this plastered on his chest:



HE DIDN'T PLAY ON A MOTHERFUCKIN' BOAT! Thanks shitty New Orleans crowd!!

Sick.

I tell my mother everything.

So when I was rehashing the events of past few weeks with a certain gentleman caller, I explained that we didn't go "all the way" because of some....errr, physical difficulties he had below the belt that I attributed to drinking.

Then she suggested that perhaps the problem wasn't excessive drinking, but that he was on high blood pressure medicine. "That's a pretty common side effect of those kinds of drugs," she said.

Later I thought about what she said. And then I remembered, my father has high blood pressure. Controlled well by medication.

Gross.

Where am I?

While zoning out on the drive to work this morning, I suddenly became a little lost at the corner of Melpomene and St. Charles until I realized that St. Charles Tavern had simply received a face lift of sorts:



Don't worry, the fabulous print on the downtown side describing the awesomeness of the tavern is still in tact and faded as ever!

Fuck that Jaegermesiter bullshit

The beer industry contributes $2.58 billion a year to the Louisiana economy, according to a study commissioned by national industry groups.

Just another reason that beer makes me fired up!!!

Well, and that the NOLA Brewery is right in my backyard. What a fun little shin dig last Thursday!!

Note to self: delete all Match.com emails from my Blackberry in the future

Today a group of my coworkers suckered me in to a last-minute project which required a group of us to go to another downtown office building for about 15 minutes or so. Another coworker, Mike, was selected dropped us off. Mike somehow acts like he's superior to me socially, intellectually, and professionally (none of which are the case - case in point: he was chosen to drive; they begged me to go to this meeting).

When dropping us off we said "Okay Mike, just drive around to avoid the meter maids for a few minutes, and we'll call you when we're done."

Mike: "Dangit, I forgot my cell phone. Here ALTR, just let me borrow your phone and call your number from someone else's phone when you all get out."

I agreed and handed over my phone.

Flash forward 10 minutes, I'm in the middle of a serious moment of the meeting with our customer , and all of a sudden it hit me......OH HOLY CRAP!!! A few weeks ago, I signed up for the trial (FREE) portion of Match.com. And they bombard me with emails every day. And I get my emails....ON MY PHONE! And he was just dying to borrow MY phone - not the phones of any of the other 4 people in the car with us. That piece of sh*t!

I'm sure he went through my messages and emails. I probably would have if I'd been in his situation. In addition to emails from Match.com, Subject Line "He Winked At You!", Mike also probably enjoyed a series of desperate-girl booty call text messages from the blackout zone, a back-and-forth banter with a gay friend about drag queen wigs and poppers, and text messages to ALTL asking her to bring me a platter of cocktail sandwiches and a daiquiri at The Fly.

I guess if I had nothing to hide, I wouldn't have to worry about this. And, there's always a chance that he didn't go through my emails and won't spread their contents around the office. Yeah right!

Oh well, live and learn.

rain, rain, go away

Tonight's Tulane/LSU game has been "rained out."

Deciding it's better to be safe than sorry, Tulane officials postponed tonight's baseball game against LSU because of the threat of severe thunderstorms around game time. - nola.com

Lame. We blame LSU.

Just another morning commute

This morning while approaching the light at St. Charles at the bridge, I found myself distacted by what looked like an economy size spill of powdered scrambled eggs with a slight off-putting color to them. I always tell myself I will blog, so I try to snap a picture on my cell phone.




As I continue my forward movement, I realize something is missing.

Someone wiped out the light at Calliope and St. Charles. Again. The last time was the weekend of March 6, not even a month ago. I first noticed this on Saturday the 7th and by Tuesday the 10th the light was back in business. I was amazed because this was the fastest light replacement I have ever seen in the city of New Orleans. However, that intersection does have the potential to be extremely dangerous, you know, with the streetcar and all.

What will the turn around be this time? And who is the culprit twice in one month?!